five past midnight

writing is coming slow recently, probably in part because of Real Life (TM) getting in the way. I wrote 84 words on Friday night, and I didn't write at all yesterday. I doubt I'll get much done tonight/today either, because I'm at this part where I need to actually write what's in my mind but the words aren't working with me. surprisingly I'm not too bothered by this total lack of speed, where April-me would have been so antsy and frustrated. I guess I'm also aware that my creativity has more or less plateaued - my writing at work has kind of taken a beating imo, I have been struggling with articles too, so it's not just a fic-thing, it's a writing-thing orz

I'm trying to describe Yaku in this fic from a first-impression POV, and for lack of a better realistic visual I'm using Gotou Takeru, or Yaku's stage play actor. I'm terrible at describing so... let's hope this turns out well lol.

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edit (10.37pm): got another 130 words in last night before I slept, but I'm definitely in a writing rut where nothing I write seems good enough so I stopped pressing it after the words stopped flowing.

didn't continue writing it after I woke up and instead got utterly sidetracked by Mel's Tanafuta (here) for like the sixth time now. except this time, I got inspired to write a continuation from Futakuchi's POV. apparently, I like making Futakuchi suffer because I've written almost 800 words now. I'm still feeling super insecure about the writing but it's fun, so I'm just rolling with the muse as it comes. 

so last night I couldn't write anything at all - I was really distracted by the Kuroyaku art that I'd discovered plus Futakuchi wasn't cooperating so I got a total of three lines in, which was frustrating because Futakuchi is actually one of the few characters I can write without much hassle orz

my current goal's to write lighter stories (with nothing in our hands-esque) (which I am very disappointed few people are reading because!!! that fic was so fun to write!!! and reading it also makes me smile stupidly!!! but I digress!!! I do understand why people didn't read/kudo it but anyway!!!) because every single one of my recent ones have been heavy, both in angst, plot and world-building. I need something... cheerier. maybe not so much giving up the mindless fluff and plots, but moreso in adopting a lighter tone.

WNIOH was an experimental fic for me and I was really pleased with how it turned out. it was surprisingly easy to write - too easy, actually, to the point where I had to take a one month break before I went back to my usual writing voice for the little bits and pieces (heck, even in bits and pieces you can tell that I'm not at 100% serious voice yet). 

I would have liked to continue writing in that style, but I was worried I would grow too used to writing that kind of tone, which would leave me with consistency problems when I went back to writing Timeless (a damn valid concern, and I'm glad I did it because I seriously struggled with writing Sunrise after that).

the dumbest part of last night came after I was already in bed.

( the dumb part )

speaking of, I track all mentions of Kuroyaku on Tweetdeck and recently there's been an influx of Kuroyaku-related tweets lol but it's all because of the light novel sketch. 

me: "Yeah y'all love Kuroyaku but do y'all read the Kuroyaku."

yes, me being petty.

in other news, I've been playing with the idea of organising a Kuroyaku week............ but time, muse and... well, time and muse. but I'm starved for content and since everyone loves Kuroyaku--

as ritzfics says, "there can never be too much kuroyaku, in fact, there's NOT ENOUGH KUROYAKU". 

I shall. um. keep playing with it first. and get more opinions.